When Love Is Calling Home
I got back to the studio right on time for my weekly management family video call. This is my ultimate booster shot; being amongst my new loving tribe. Sorry, John Lydon, but that type of relationship is way more energetic than any type of anger; empowerment leads to personal growth, which leads the way to evolution and self-redefinition. The “new me” likes it a lot…! I introduced Mikko, and I talked a little about the ongoing album production before starting to oversee some of the specifics related to my 3-records project coming up this year — which is highly exciting for me. It was such a positive meeting that I moved on from the particularly downing medical appointment I just had less than an hour before; talking about heart and soul, and their resulting art forms was what I needed the most. Life! I could totally spare anything death-related for half a day… Life, life, life!!!
I was about to get back to the studio when my phone rang. I was surprised, for several reasons: I never use my phone. Well, it’s in my pocket to count my daily steps, but that’s about it. Let’s backtrack a little; I never had a phone before joining my new management family. Yes, you read it right; phone or communication used to be: “You can reach me on Jeff’s phone anytime.” Not the most significant way to make new friends, right? Anyway… I bought myself a phone last April or May, used it for a few weeks — I probably looked like an 89-year-old seeing a smartphone for the first time in their lives. “Oh wow it’s a flashlight! What do you mean, we can see and be seen with that? It’s a magic thing! Take this away from me in the name of God!” or something like that — you got the point. All that to say, my phone rang. After wondering how to use the “press here to talk” function, I realized it was Jennie, as in Jennie my precious friend, cornerstone of my management family.
She was calling me to make sure I was ok. She’s one of the most incredible people I have had the blessing to meet in my life, someone who cares for real. I can’t lie to Jennie; even “old fragmented me” knows he doesn’t have that power over me. She was concerned, so she wanted to make sure I was not hitting myself with the hammer of negativity: “I read your journal and it worries me.” It’s true that I haven’t refrained much from simply saying how I feel and how things are going — if at all. I honestly didn’t realize that I was spiraling down. For me, it was about being tired, overwhelmed, and feeling behind. But after talking with Jennie, I realized that I was indeed being pretty hardcore on myself. While she had wanted to talk to me for a while, the trigger for her call came as I referred to myself as “useless”: “Alex, my precious friend, you have to stop that now please. This is totally false. You have to slow down a bit; it will give you time to look around and have a different perspective on everything you are accomplishing, which is phenomenal. You have to start enjoying it. There’s no stress and no pressure here, only an overflow of life and joy. Embrace it, Alex. There’s no fear in letting yourself shine.”
There’s nothing like genuine love to heal a spirit so used to its own darkness that it became difficult to distinguish vivid lights from sorrowful gloom. I am blessed beyond measure to have that kind of loving friends to not only show me the way, but to walk the distance with me.
I was about to get back to the studio when my phone rang. I was surprised, for several reasons: I never use my phone. Well, it’s in my pocket to count my daily steps, but that’s about it. Let’s backtrack a little; I never had a phone before joining my new management family. Yes, you read it right; phone or communication used to be: “You can reach me on Jeff’s phone anytime.” Not the most significant way to make new friends, right? Anyway… I bought myself a phone last April or May, used it for a few weeks — I probably looked like an 89-year-old seeing a smartphone for the first time in their lives. “Oh wow it’s a flashlight! What do you mean, we can see and be seen with that? It’s a magic thing! Take this away from me in the name of God!” or something like that — you got the point. All that to say, my phone rang. After wondering how to use the “press here to talk” function, I realized it was Jennie, as in Jennie my precious friend, cornerstone of my management family.
She was calling me to make sure I was ok. She’s one of the most incredible people I have had the blessing to meet in my life, someone who cares for real. I can’t lie to Jennie; even “old fragmented me” knows he doesn’t have that power over me. She was concerned, so she wanted to make sure I was not hitting myself with the hammer of negativity: “I read your journal and it worries me.” It’s true that I haven’t refrained much from simply saying how I feel and how things are going — if at all. I honestly didn’t realize that I was spiraling down. For me, it was about being tired, overwhelmed, and feeling behind. But after talking with Jennie, I realized that I was indeed being pretty hardcore on myself. While she had wanted to talk to me for a while, the trigger for her call came as I referred to myself as “useless”: “Alex, my precious friend, you have to stop that now please. This is totally false. You have to slow down a bit; it will give you time to look around and have a different perspective on everything you are accomplishing, which is phenomenal. You have to start enjoying it. There’s no stress and no pressure here, only an overflow of life and joy. Embrace it, Alex. There’s no fear in letting yourself shine.”
There’s nothing like genuine love to heal a spirit so used to its own darkness that it became difficult to distinguish vivid lights from sorrowful gloom. I am blessed beyond measure to have that kind of loving friends to not only show me the way, but to walk the distance with me.
